My Covid Micro-wedding

Thursday, December 13, 2018 was such a memorable day for me. It is the day that my now husband, Emile, put together a very elaborate proposal which if you know him, know that it was a big deal as I am the planner in the relationship. Soon after the proposal, my type-A personality started the wedding planning!

I started looking for venues, vendors, comparing prices, all while putting together our budget, timeframe and the guest list. Every single bride and/or wedding planner that I know has told me that whatever I would like to do for my wedding and however small I would like to keep it, it would magnify itself through the course, and I really was determined not to let that happen. But guess what… IT DID! What was supposed to be a 60 person wedding, ended up being a guest count of 120, at a venue that was beautiful but not technically our type of vibe. We also ended up having a bridal party when we did not initially want one, and also deciding that we would like to now change outfits because we want to incorporate both the Muslim Indian aspect as well as the American aspect. It became a production… nonetheless we were incredibly excited with all the planning as our wedding date was set for April 19, 2020. It felt like it became another full-time job along with my actual, very demanding, full-time job that I had. We didn’t have too many hiccups in this process but there was just a feeling in me that this wasn’t my “dream wedding”. I had no doubt that it was going to be a beautiful day but something about it felt off.

We’re now a month away from the scheduled April wedding, and unfortunately COVID-19 hit the United States. We were devastated to have to reschedule our wedding but were optimistic that by August, all of this would subside, so we selected the date of August 16, 2020 as the venue and all the vendors were available, and proceeded to inform all of our family and friends of the change. Obviously we were very wrong about this pandemic as it is here for the long-haul. Emile and I had to make a decision in June of what we were doing – whether we are going to be postponing to a third date or get married? And at this point, we truly just wanted to get married! So this is where my wedding becomes a “COVID Micro-Wedding.”

Mid June we made a decision to still have this wedding on the August 16 date but the question came to how we were going to have the wedding? who were we going to select to invite? and what about all the vendors that we already booked? The great news at that point was that New York State COVID rate was below 1%, so we feel comfortable to have a small gathering with less than 50 people. We knew we had to plan smart:

STEP 1- RESEARCH: I did was search online on Airbnb and peer space for a space that I can rent to host a small gathering (due to our venue being in New Jersey and not hosting gatherings"). Because of COVID, we wanted to find somewhere with as much outdoor space so folks aren’t inclined to stay indoors the entire time. I came across an amazing townhouse in Brooklyn that was totally our vibe and reached out to the owner and let them know my situation. Fortunately for us, this townhouse usually gets rented out for small parties and events so that worked out great!

STEP 2 - CONNECT: We reached out to all my vendors and either having to do the unfortunate e-mail of canceling them and or re-booking them at a smaller and new scale and seeing if they feel safe/and if they now work with a completely new wedding. I do have to say for the most part, all the vendors have been so understanding and great to work with and no real issues. I kept my hair and make up artist, my photographer, the DJ, and the florist.

STEP 3- VISION: We completely re-imaged the whole plan that we originally had, and I let them know my new visual, plans and also sent them pictures of the new space so they got an understanding of what they were working with, especially the florist Day Dream Floral.

STEP 4- PLAN: I rented some chairs for the ceremony then we had the catering team “flip” the space and added high top and cocktail style tables with the chairs so guest had an outdoor space to mingle.

STEP 5- FOOD: We decided that instead of a sit down dinner, I wanted to keep the food more casual. I hired Eventfull.NYC to cater the wedding which they did a lot of pass hors d’oeuvres and some very fun food stations. One being a taco station with all the fixings, and another being a kebob station. This enabled guests to grab the food and head either outside/inside/the dance floor/wherever they choose to go. I also saved on alcohol because I only opted to do soft drinks and beer and wine with no liquor.

I was so grateful that all these vendors were OK with being at this event due to COVID and I had assured them that I will be requesting all my guests to quarantine themselves for the two weeks prior to the wedding event for everybody’s health and safety.

STEP 6- INVITE: Now the part comes for choosing who we actually invite since we were going to keep the guest count to 45 and below We kept it easy and simple - doing immediate family and some of our closest aunts, uncles and cousins. Then in terms of friends, we invited all of our friends that came to our respective bachelorette/bachelor parties and their significant others. We then had to send those emails/Text messages to all the other guests of our new plans and everybody who was no longer invited, completely understood the situation and gave us their well wishes and blessings which was a huge relief for us.

There was some DIY that went into this micro wedding:

1) Bar and food signs

2) Bottles of hand sanitizers and water bottles both with personalized labels

3) Door signs for the bathroom and “please do not enter” for guest rooms

4) A polaroid “snap and pin” guest book area

5) Reserved seating signs so family members always had a seat

We also had to set up as well as break down the venue before and after the wedding which I had asked my friends to help with. The one advice I do have would be to hire a planner and/or day of coordinator. This micro-wedding also became a bit of a ‘raw space’ wedding where i had to bring in and do many things on my own and I couldn’t have done it without my girlfriend's help. She also happens to be a wedding planner so this was second nature to her and I am very grateful for her guidance and help with everything!

All in all, the micro-wedding ended up being exactly what Emile and I wanted in the first place- something intimate, fun, and with our closest friends and family. Even though we felt so defeated at a certain point, we knew in our hearts that everything would work itself out the way it was supposed to, because at the end of the day, LOVE.ALWAYS.WINS.

-Nazra Khalid-Devaux